The Last Time
by MoonytheMarauder1
Summary: Right before the events of Halloween, Peter attends to Remus after the full moon. His friend is weak and tired, but still believes so blindly in the good of the Order—of their friends. But Peter knows the truth.


**A/N: Hey y'all! This was written for Hogwarts. Prompts are below :)**

**Word Count: 1150**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Those rights go to JK Rowling.**

**Note: Unbeta'd. So sorry.**

**Enjoy!**

"Do you ever wonder if you made the wrong choice?"

Remus looked up, a startled expression on his face. He stopped stirring his tea, ending the soft clinking sounds of his spoon hitting the teacup. He furrowed his brows at his friend. "Wrong choice? About what?"

Peter swallowed, suddenly alarmed by the words he'd let slip out. If Remus knew, if he guessed… but then again, insecurity was something the werewolf understood. And Peter needed to get this off of his chest.

"With… with the war. Joining the Order. Do you ever think that maybe it would have been better if…" Peter trailed off, his blue eyes shut tight. He couldn't keep going.

"If I should never have gotten involved?" Remus set down his spoon. "If I'd stayed neutral?"

Of course Remus would never consider joining the Dark Lord. He was too good for that—Peter hated himself a little bit more for what he'd done. "Yeah."

Remus exhaled slowly, running a hand through his tawny hair. "I… I think it would be easier," he admitted softly, the scar running from the corner of his left eye to the right corner of his mouth rippling as he spoke, "and I think I might be happier. But I don't think it would be right, not getting involved. Change comes with action."

Peter felt helpless—like he was drowning and Remus had the rope, but didn't realize he needed to throw it. He sighed and moved over to Remus, helping him to sit down in an armchair. He dipped a cloth into a nearby basin of water and Remus obediently unbuttoned his shirt so Peter could clean off the worst of the wounds. The previous night had been a full moon, and Peter was the only one who ever attended anymore. Sadly, a rat couldn't stop a wolf from tearing itself apart.

Remus hissed quietly when the cloth touched a particularly large gash, and Peter frowned. "Sorry," he murmured.

Remus smiled tiredly at him. "Don't worry. Now… you were saying?"

Peter was a little less nervous talking now that he had something else to concentrate on, so after a moment's hesitation, he continued. "Aren't you afraid you'll die?"

The question was quiet and shamefaced, but Remus answered anyway.

"If I die," Remus said with surprising conviction, "my brothers will avenge me. We stand together. So I suppose if I do die… I'll know it wasn't in vain. And that's what really matters, isn't it?"

Peter flinched. "I dunno," he muttered. "I'd rather not die at all, I think."

He couldn't help but feel that they were playing with fire. They could die any day, and for what? Maybe Remus was right—maybe they would avenge each other, but then what? To the rest of the world, it would be like they had never existed.

It was a disturbing truth, but Peter would trade secrets for his moment of bliss. It was selfish and cruel, he knew. But good didn't always win; in fact, it was losing this war. Peter refused to be on the wrong side of it.

"I don't want to die either," Remus murmured, wincing as Peter wrapped a bandage around his arm. "I just… I don't want to wake up one day and regret not having done more to help. What if someone died because I wasn't there to help? I'm no soldier, Peter, but I want to help everyone I can."

And wasn't that just like Remus? Willing to throw himself into the crossfire, just because there was a chance that he could take a hit for someone. Peter had only just realized for himself how unlikely it was that anyone would return that favor—they were too terrified. James and Sirius… really, they only looked out for each other. When Peter looked back, it had always been that way.

He'd always thought that they would have his back, but that just wasn't the case. He and Remus could fend for themselves as far as they were concerned. Abandoning the two of them on full moons was proof enough.

"You would never join the other side, would you Remus?" He knew the answer. But he asked anyway.

A flash of hurt crossed Remus' face and he seemed to wilt as he reached for the sunglasses on the table nearby, the light getting to be too much for his eyes. "I'm not the traitor," he whispered.

"I know you're not," Peter said honestly. "I'm just asking… would anything ever tempt you?"

Remus looked at him curiously. "You, James, Sirius, Lily, and Harry are my family. I could never, no matter what was offered me, join someone who wanted to harm even one of you. You're all so much more important."

Peter swallowed. If there was anyone he regretted betraying, it was Remus. Their little family was so important to him… if only he could see that it had never truly existed.

"Don't get so attached to things, Remus," Peter said raspily. "Learn to let go."

It was a warning of what was to come. When the Dark Lord removed the last obstacle in his way, he didn't want Remus left mourning until his death.

Amber eyes, dark behind the sunglasses, peered at Peter closely. "The world isn't all bad, Peter," he said at last. "Merlin knows I wasn't given the best lot" —he held up his bandaged arm as proof— "but I think that makes it more important than ever to hang on to the good things. I _like_ my life. I love the people in it. We'll get through this because we have to."

And they called him naive.

A clap of thunder interrupted them, making both men jump. Peter looked out the window at the pouring rain and groaned. "Rain, please go away," he mumbled. "I still have to… argh."

Remus followed his gaze. "Take my coat and umbrella," he offered. "I don't need them, anyway."

Peter looked over at him. "Are you sure?"

"You have places to be," Remus reminded him gently, "and I'll just be inside all day. Better hurry before it gets even worse."

Peter stared for a moment at his oldest friend, wondering how'd they'd grown to be so different. There was Remus, generous with his possessions, love, faith, and trust—then there was Peter, selfish with his life and full of lies and betrayal.

He took the coat and umbrella.

"Peter?" Remus said softly. "Be careful out there. Don't you dare leave me here." _Don't you dare die._

"I won't." _He was too valuable to the Dark Lord._

The two high-fived and hugged—a habit they'd developed when they were eleven and still had lives ahead of them—and then Peter left, shivering against the chill.

Or maybe it was the knowledge that that was the last time he'd see Remus before the world as they knew it ended.

Whatever the case, Remus wouldn't be getting his coat back.

**A/N: **

**Writing Club: **

**Assorted Appreciation: 7. Princess Alice — Write a fic set during a war**

**Disney Challenge: Characters 2. Buzz Lightyear — Write about someone realizing what they've always believed is a lie**

**Book Club: Luke Castellan — (feature) scar, (theme) betrayal, (genre) angst**

**Showtime: 3. The SQUIP Song — (word) helpless**

**Sophie's Shelf: 8. Frey — "We stand together."**

**Liza's Loves — "So take your empty words, your empty promises." - Predictable **

**Angel's Arcade: 2. Voldo — (theme) loyalty, (word) disturbing, (phrase) moment of bliss**

**Lo's Lowdown: 9. (trait) loyal**

**Bex's Basement: 10. Frank Longbottom — Write about someone standing up for what they believe in**

**Film Festival 18. (dialogue) "My brothers will avenge me."**

**Seasonal Challenges: **

**Days of the Year: 18th April — Write about high-fiving someone**

**Spring: 24. (dialogue) "Rain, please go away."**

**Amanda's Challenge: Pairings 21. Klaus Mikaelson/Hope Mikaelson — Alt. Write about protecting your family**

**Hufflepuff Challenge: Traits 9. Generous**

**Fortnightly: **

**Jazzy June: ParvatiLavender — (phrase) playing with fire, (object) sunglasses, (plot point) caring for another's injury, (dialogue) "Don't you dare leave me here."**

**I Am Iron Man: Iron Man 2: 3. "Don't get so attached to things. Learn to let go." - Hammer**

**Gym: Madam Pomfrey: (weather) storm**

**Heads or Tails: Tails: (quote) "It takes great courage to see the world in all its tainted glory, and still to love it." - Oscar Wilde**

**Paint by Number: Yellow: 1. teacup**

**Truth or Dare: "Do you ever wonder if you made the wrong choice?"**

**365 Words: 312. Nervous**

**Insane House Challenge: 180. (theme) deception**


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